he is always telling me either its his way or the highway he wants me to stop backing out of things n try to enjoy life a little ...
he thinks i am scared and wants to know wht scares me the most abt this sex thing...i told him everything that i dont find any practical purpose in sex..if it is done without any commitment...
he said tht ive freaking backed out again...he always expects the unexpected...that is why he isnt going all crazy after that email...now he wants me to ... expect the unexpected and tht is sex...with the one and only,him..
he thinks that we shud live for the moment enjoy the good moments while they last because during the bad period of time u can look back at the better moments and say to ur self life wasnt all tht bad... this is how he lives his life...
I just cant give myself to anyone...but on the other hand i am really sad..bcoz i guess ive lost him...i guess there is no way u cud ever make the person realize how much u love em...no matter how hard you try..it has to cum to an end..i dont know wht to do now?
His way or the highway? If this if the guy's attitude, anyone dating him is in big trouble. Relationships are about listening to both people's views, respecting each other, and realizing when the desires of one hurts the other - they need to back off.
Living in the moment is fine if that makes him happy, but from the number of emails I've got from you about this - what about this moment will make YOU happy? There's pressure, no real communication, him blaming you for 'backing off' (when in fact you are standing up for yourself! good job!), and your views that you don't want to have sex without commitment.
It seems to me you have made up your mind about the sex, but now you need a way to move forward.
Perhaps getting to know some other guys can help you realize what you do want from someone. You should not have to sacrifice parts of yourself that are important to you to another person - ever. There are guys in the world who will believe you when you say you love them. There are guys who will be honest when they say they love you.
And when you do finally decide to have sex with a guy who is committed to you (the WHOLE you, not just the bits and pieces that fit his belief system), it'll be well worth the wait.
In the meantime, allow yourself time to grieve. A relationship is ending, and you need to allow it to end. Keeping in contact and trying to win this guy round to your way of thinking isn't going to work. Ending this with some self-respect (and perhaps some tears) will.
Write in your journal, ask advice here, talk to friends, meet other guys, join other internet groups. Be yourself and all the rest will fall into place.
Best of luck.